I am Woman

I AM WOMAN! I just feel like shouting it with enthusiasm this morning. I do that when I feel like womanhood is being despised and I normally yell "Capital W" to myself or those with me when I feel like someone has shown extra strength in her womanhood. Dang, don't you just hate it. We are told we must have the bodies of pre-pubesent (sp?) little girls when curves show a reflection of our inner beauty as grown-up, mature, intelligent women not to mention celebrating motherhood. I also hate it when we are told we must be like men to have something significant to offer in society as a whole (have you heard about the controversy of women taking testosterone injections to make it in the workplace?). Excuse me! Are we not also made in the image of God. Do we not, in the strength of our womanhood, add something unique to society. If we celebrate womanhood does that make us weak? On the other extreme does celebrating womanhood make us despise men? I think if we stop despising our womanhood and start stepping out as women in the way that we were created, by a God who definately knew what He was doing, then we will stop despising men (can you say "passive aggressive") and will be vibrant partners to men and together we will be a full, rich, beautiful expression of God and his nature to the world that we were intended to be. Whew, got that off my chest!

Comments

[Heather]

You go girl!!!!

[magz]

YOu GO GIRL! I think you are absolutely right. Feminism, while highlighting some things that definitely needed to be highlighted in the way we 'do' gender stuff, has done us a diservice by making us into wannabee-men, and so reinforcing the same old same old. Why CAN"T we celebrate our difference, our woman-ness? Why can't we exalt homemaking and motherhood to the places of honour they should be? Why is it seen as a 'cop out' to keep the home-fires burning? so much grrr...

[cindz]

I'm behind you all the way debbie (yes, some people may be surprised to hear that coming from me, but, contrary to popular misconception, i am NOT a feminist!). when mags and i went to the middle east we were ready to feel sorry for these poor misguided, downtrodden women, but instead we came away in awe of their feminine strengths, and their nuturing side that has been degraded in western culture. It was a real eye-opener!

[carey]

Thank you! This is so much how I feel but am usually very bad at putting into words

[Amy]

I am doing the happy dance as we speak (and it's hard to do that and type at the same type). You are 100% right!! Amen sister, keep it coming.

[heather miller]

Rock on sister....rock on !

[Karin]

When my kids were young I and a number of my friends found this book very helpful and affirming: http://shop.ekklesia.co.uk/christian-bookshop/and_then_i_had_kids__encouragement_for_mothers_of_young_children_28561.html

I see Susan Alexander Yates has now brought out a book about being a mum of teenagers as well.

[Karin]

oops link was too long, it seems.
The book title is 'And then I had kids'.

[Christina]

I am reading the book Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge. He wrote Wild at Heart. Captivating covers this issue in a fascinating way. God has traits that he gave specifically to man (warrior, strength, leader) and God has traits that he gave to women (beauty, desire to be pursued, adventure, romance, etc...). These traits are reflections of him. He has each of these traits and when he created us in his own image he bestowed on Adam certain characteristics and on Eve certain characteristics. As women we are, literally God's "crown of creation." If you look at the creation story in Genesis everything God creates has more detail, is more intricate than the last. Eve was the very last thing, "Eve was the crescendo." She was the Master's finishing touch. We are to embody those characteristics and be proud of them as they are reflections of God.

Really I could go on and on about this. It's an incredible book. It's already been life-changing for me and I am on Chapter 4! I encourage EVERYONE to read it - both men and women! I think it will change the way we think about ourselves as women.

God bless!

[Tractor Girl]

Wow, go for it. Having grown up in a time where there were so many people trying to make equality mean "the same as" it took time to unlearn that and gain a bit more confidence in my identity as woman.

Just one note,though, rather than just focusing on that partnership in terms of marriage (which is the way I kinda automatically read it) can we look at it in the wider terms of work, church, etc aswell?

[Existential Punk]

i am not a mom, but i am a woman and i so relate to your post! i struggle with similar things as a 36 year old single woman in the dating sphere. i blog about it here: http://existentialpunk.typepad.com/existential_punk/2005/06/stepford_wives_.html

[Debbie]

Wow I am not alone in this! Thanks for the comments and the book links. So much of the time talking about how we are being women can be devisive. I guess celebrating womanhood in ourselves and each other is a good starting point for us to determine what it means to each individual in detail.

btw. Partnership is most definately intended in the larger sense as well as the marriage. Sorry to be so confusing.

[Becky Martinovich]

Wow......this is my 1st time here. So far I love it. As a mother of 6 kids, all of whom I home school here in the US.......I say........YES!

I too get tired of hearing "I would be sooo bored if I stayed home." or "do you have a "real" job?" LOL! And we aren't even allowed to slap them! Go figure....

I am finally learning to rejoice in my womanhood, and all the wonderful things God placed in me that he didn't in my hubby!

Be blessed........I'm adding you to my favs!

Love,
Becky

[Karin]

In response to the last post by Becky, I'd like to say that I thoroughly enjoyed my time at home with the kids when they were little, but once they went to school full-time I did start to get bored and now think it might have been better if I'd found a part-time job earlier on.

In my part of the world hardly anyone is home during the day, so once the kids are in Junior School it gets hard to find people to chat to, and even harder once you stop going to meet your kids at the school gate where other parents are gathered. I find that going out to work is essential if I want to be able to talk to other people during the week. Mind you, I probably have deeper conversations via the internet, but I still need to talk to "real people" even if it's pretty superficial - and it isn't always.

I'd also say that women need to make sure their whole world isn't centred around their kids and they don't define themselves simply as a mother (or even housewife and mother) or it will be harder to readjust once they've grown up and left home.

[Karin]

The last paragraph is referring to women who are mothers, of course. Perhaps those who aren't need to take care they don't define themselves simply by what they do and that they do have interests outside of work.

[Debbie]

It is all such a delicate balance isn't it. Different for each one of us and different for each of our seasons. I think a really important thing to remember is not to judge ourselves or others in the choices each of us make. I knew a very wise young mother before I had kids, named Cindy (different from Cindy on sidebar). At times she was homeschooling all her kids, at times only one or half homeschooling one, at times she was working outside the home, at times not. She said, "I need to consider each child an individual and each term a new season and approach each with fresh eyes and willingness to change."

[Karin]

That seems like a very wise approach to me. I think considering the needs of the individual is very important and it can be a very delicate balance when taking the needs of several individuals into consideration.

Perhaps those of us who are Christians also need to try and hear what God is saying to us as individuals and not just go with the flow, whether it's going out to work like most women seem to these days, even if they have very young kids, or staying at home if that is what is deemed the acceptable thing for mothers to do in our church.

That different things are appropriate at different stages in life should also be an important factor in our decision making.

[Debbie]

Karin,
You go girl

[sharonb]

I'm a young mom in Dallas,TX. Your thoughts and all your comments have been so refreshing and encouraging to me. I've chosen to stay home with my children not too long ago and have just begun omeschooling. (That's not too common here in the suburbs. Most young children are in daycare or preschool.) I love the idea that we should consider each stage and each individual in our decision making and be willing to change in each new season. That gives me a lot to think about.

[lisa c]

Hi.
Thanks for your post and everyone's comments. Rarely do we hear female voices in the virtual world - and I welcome it!

Sometimes we get caught up in the masculine and need a place to be with women, to be WOMAN.

I don't have children but can relate to some of what you say. I am also wary of not defining myself as someone who isn't a mother - almost like that's our role in life so if we aren't that then we are less of a woman.

We need to embrace all of this and support one another.

[Debbie]

I think that even women that dont have physical children are mothers. Mother Teresa was ministering out of her motherhood and she never had physical children. Her motherhood was intwined with the part of her that gave depth to her ministry.