Crying with Dixie Chicks

Sitting in our flat wondering why I havent been blogging. I had a good excuse. A pity party over a broken digital camera. Being unable to lace my blog with images seemed like a good basis for self-indulgent pity. )I'm sorry but stealing my husband's images just didn't do it) But I knew that wasn't really it.

Last night Mark brought Hannah home after she spent the afternoon with his girls. He fiddled with our ipod a bit and found Dixie Chicks "Landslide".

"This song makes me cry."

I start talking about other songs from Austin artists.

The type of responses that you bring in when you don't really care about the other person and it is all about conversation and not about relationship.

Debbie, you selfish, pathetic, superficial slug. What has happened. I have been gliding on the surface of real conversation. Too lazy to dip my fingers into real conversation and involvement in what really matters in mine and others lives. Those that I really care about.

I hate this in others. And here I am. I mean, it is a fine place to visit but I don't want to live there.

I been feeling the void, the emptyness and the loneliness. Now that I have figured out the problem is with me maybe I can do something about it.

This is why I havent been blogging. Because I have been too lazy to interact with people and ideas to have anything reasonable to blog.

Dang it.

God, forgive me for my laziness.

In the meantime I will just sit still for a bit cry with Dixie Chicks.

Comments

[shannon]

deb--- glad to know you are normal.. thanks for being real, transparent and vulnerable.

[cindz]

welcome back to the blogosphere debbie! it's so good to read from you again. i'm sorry you're going through this time. just know your friends and family are thinking of you and praying for you.
*hug* cindz :-)

[bobbie]

i like the fleetwood mac version of the song better but i think it's because of the memories attached to it.

this is one of the most difficult areas for me too - engaging outside. i'm okay in the blogosphere, but having to have that outside interactions just sometimes seems to draining and dangerous sometimes.

thanks for sharing and welcome back!

[elegy]

i've found that the billy corgan version moves me the most, filling me with melancholy and lost memories. its beautiful...

[StCasserole]

Could it be that you needed time away?
Welcome back!

[Susan]

Debbie,
I'm lifting up a prayer for you right now. Asking our Abba Father to put His arms around you and comfort you. Sometimes you need to recharge, renew, restore, and replinish your spirit. If you ever want to come here for some personal r & r the door is always opened. I remember when I had young children I always took a week or two off every year to do just that. Also I find myself with too many expectations for the holidays. My motto this year is simplicity. Keep it simple! What would happen if we were only allowed to give spiritual gifts to each other?

[Susan]

Debbie,
I'm lifting up a prayer for you right now. Asking our Abba Father to put His arms around you and comfort you. Sometimes you need to recharge, renew, restore, and replinish your spirit. If you ever want to come here for some personal r & r the door is always opened. I remember when I had young children I always took a week or two off every year to do just that. Also I find myself with too many expectations for the holidays. My motto this year is simplicity. Keep it simple! What would happen if we were only allowed to give spiritual gifts to each other?

[Deborah Schumacher]

I'm thinking about you and wishing you a Happy New Year.

I come by and read you as part of my regular church blog and hope you are doing well.

[miller talbot]

Mum,

turn off the water works. we need to hear your earthy tales of life in the kingdom. we love your perspective and the simple truths that apply to each of us.

i understand writer's block and it sound like you've got it bad. but buck up, you're great and we love you!

peace

[wilsonian]

I know you've been busy moving again...

But I'm with Miller. Miss your presence here.

[the blicks]

Don't let discourgement win, Debbie. This is the tenth time I've hoped you are blogging. In EVERYTHING give thanks. Cindz went to the Stuart's church on sunday and was blown away by what Bruce had to say and how he said it. Stay tuned.....love fleur blick

[David]

Debbie
Sent here from Andrew's blog today - I am a big fan. But reading this, I really feel there is a need for the blogosphere to hear your voice also. The move to Stromness was lghtly skipped over by TSK, but there is another side of the story. The fact that the furniture doesn't fit, things lost, the tears shed. We need to hear this because this is what life is about. Women connect with things in a different way - people need to hear that.

My wife struggles with motherhood too, I can't get her to even read my blog!

[Amy Dale]

Debbie,
I know we haven't met, but my husband reads your husband's blog and hooked me into your blog a while back! I LOVE it and really got so much out of reading it! I really value who you are and all that you have to give. Thanks for mentoring me without knowing it! I really miss reading it! Is it over?
Amy

[whitney]

Hey Lady

I am just really missing you.....

[fleur blick]

Debbie, let's talk. I met another Debbie at NorthBeach Bapos in the tiny tots creche. Before she told me her name, I told her she reminded me of you. They have four boys and lost a girl. She is searching for a mission and was intrigued by your family. You have been a mum to all of mine. Thanks and may you continue to be real and authentic always. love fleur blick

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